Best Beer in the World, A Tasting of

If you have read my blog, you probably saw the entry where I paid a ridiculous amount of money for a beer. I know it's been awhile but I finally got around to acquiring some editing software. The occasion of trying the beer for the very first time was actually caught on camera. I tried to add some production value and make it fun.
This is me trying the uber rare, Westveleteren 12.
Enjoy. Or, you know, try to.

What the Crap?

We have been in a little bit of a drought here in San Antonio, so the past two days of rain have been a welcome surprise. I know some people hate rain, or sunshine, or snow, or snowy rain or rainy sunshine, but not me. I love all the changes mother nature throws at us. The only time I am not jovial about these naturally occurring curve balls is when I'm driving.
Case in point, I get off of work yesterday and head home. As my trip began there was a slight sprinkle, nothing that would bring us out of the drought, but enough to be satisfied we are seeing rain. As I get on I-10 and pick up speed the rain begins to fall heavier. Traffic slows well below
the speed limit as the rain continues to pummel our horseless carriages. As I near my exit, traffic from the middle rain begins to swerve into the right or left lanes, dodging an object in the middle. Through the downpour I could see the object slowly approaching.
What was it? It was large, coming up to the hood of my Durango; it also had a pale color on one side.
"What the crap?" I said outloud. Seconds later I found out how right I was.

A porta-potty lay on its side right in the middle lane of I-10. The door had even been jarred open from the fall off the truck. I couldn't help but laugh and I wish I had a camera on me at that moment.

Phil & Ryan's Excellent Adventure

Nerd Alert:
This entry is me boasting about my nerdiness. So if nerds, geeks, dorks, dweebs, twerps or goobs make you uncomfortable, it's probably best you stop reading this, for own safety and to salvage what self-respect I have.
Generally, my weekends are pretty uneventful, save for the occasional weekend when the girlfriend comes down from Dallas. I spend my Saturdays and Sundays sleeping in, ordering fast food, watching movies, going to Sea World and perfecting laziness to an art form.
This particular weekend was a bit different. It took me and my buddy Ryan on a wonderful journey that any nerd, and other thesaurus related terms mentioned above, would appreciate.
Saturday, I casually woke up around 10AM, after a hard night of playing video games. The current games I'm addicted to: Indiana Jones Lego: The Original Adventures and Metal Gear Solid 4: Sons of the Patriots. After styling my infamous hair and dressing to the nines in my baggy shorts and wrinkled shirt, I decided to run a few errands.
Spontaneity is a rare form for me, but I suddenly got the urge to visit Sea World. I have a season pass so it's no biggie. Got myself a drink, saw the sharks, the penguins and a dolphin or two. There may have been an man dressed as a penguin... but I can't remember because I was swept up in all the excitement. During my time at Sea World, my buddy Ryan gave me a call.
His baby mama went to the river and he had nothing to do.
I drove over and we played video games for a bit then got to talking about how we would spend our day.

I have a Sega Genesis, it's an old school gaming system from the late 80's to the early 90's. When I was in Dallas to see Shannon, I found an old game that I loved to play, NBA Jam and picked it up.
So while Ryan and I were brainstorming, I got the idea to go old school video game shopping. We decided to hit up local pawn shops. Store after store, we had no success. On our way to yet another pawn shop I decided to check the white pages on my phone and began calling all the game stores that I did not recognize.
I called one and the owner told me "We are unlike any other store in the world."
Naturally, I was intrigued. "Go on," I told him.
They are a retro gaming, arcade, card game and Role-Playing Game center. Just the night before they had received a massive shipment of old retro games. Jackpot!
When we arrived we were greeted my a man named Cliff. We were shown back to the dozen or so boxes that Cliff had not had a chance to look through since the man who sold them to him dropped them off.
Ryan and I took it upon ourselves to go through the boxes and began putting items in sections. NES with NES, SNES with SNES, Sega to Sega, Atari to Atari, the list went on and so did the hours.

(NES)

(SNES)

(Sega)

(Atari)

An undetermined amount of time later, we had gone through every box and even set aside stuff for ourselves. I got a wireless controller port for the NES controllers, Link 1 and 2 in the original gold cartridges with a few other things.
Their gaming guru, the man who fixes and cleans all the retro stuff that comes in, just happened to pop in. The man with the gut and the Aussie accent spent the next stretch of undetermined amount of time telling us about the history of video games.

Fun Fact:
Did you know that Nintendo originally was designing a CD based gaming system to compete with the Sega Saturn. Nintendo was working with Sony on developing this system when they screwed Sony over and the deal ended. Sony sat back and decided they had all this hardware, why not add a few more things and create their own system. Thus Nintendo's folly led to the birth of the Playstation.

We slowly worked our way to the door after making our purchase, and getting a few items for free, since they had free labor from us arranging all the items from the many boxes.
During the Aussie's incoherent babbling, we did hear him mention a retro gaming store in New Braunfels that was an impressive sight. It was about 10PM at this point, the D-Pad in NB was open until Midnight. We looked at each other and yelled "Road Trip!" The rest of the journey was in silence because Ryan then yelled "Jinx."
After getting lost, then having to call and find directions because they weren't were Google said they were, thanks for that, we found our way to D-Pad.
Inside, it was like a mini-mecca for those who love retro games. Walls of Sega, NES, SNES, Saturn and the like. We perused and gawked I think I loitered for a while in the corner. I decided to buy a few games, for the NES (which I don't have) and for the Sega (I do)
We drove home and I played my newly purchased Sega games. Since I have been on a retro kick. I went a bought an original Nintendo. I didn't work so I took it back and had Shannon buy me a system that plays both NES and SNES games. She's bringing it down this weekend. I'm excited.
There is the full-extent. I hope you aren't blind due to the severity. It was a fun day. Now I'm going to go home and play "Zombies Ate my Neighbors."

Awkward Scenario: Episode 1

This blog will deal with an awkward scenario I encountered a week ago. I debated about whether or not to blog about this, but I was given the OK by a certain middle party.
I was in Dallas over June 6th - 8th, visiting friends and family. This particular event happened Saturday night.
Shannon, the girlfriend, and I went out to a bar called Cape Buffalo. There we met her parents to celebrate their mutual friend, Jennifer's, birthday.
To begin with, I asked Shannon all day, What time does it start?"
She kept shrugging off the question, saying "We'll get there when we get there."
We settle down to watch Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. About an hour into the flick, we get a call from Shannon's mother Cathee asking where we were.
The party started at 8PM and it was currently, 9:45PM. Shannon's parents had already been there for over an hour. The birthday girl was turning 30, so I guess she decided her friends couldn't stay out as late and started the party 8PM instead of 11PMish.
We rush to the bar where everyone has already been drinking. Jennifer is trashed and spouts profanity at me, a person she just met.

I couldn't tell if she was an angry drunk or just plain drunk. I talked with one man who works for Texas schools. He travels from district to district checking up on them. He was really boring.
I talked to Greg, Shannon's step-father, about Horse Racing, because Big Brown just had a disappointing loss.
To be honest, I don't know a thing about horse racing. Here's what I do know:
Horses race each other around a track. The small people that ride them around this track are called Jockies. They wear brightly colored outfits so people can tell them apart from all the other little people. Spectators bet money on this sport. One of the horses is named Big Brown.
That is the extent of my horse racing knowledge, but Greg had a few drinks before I got there and I was able to fool him about what I did not know.
From there Shannon's parents, Shannon and I all drove to a place where everyone knows their name, The Apple...

It's a small dive tucked away in between a restaurant and a gas station.
Now all this is leading up to the awkward scenario.
After a few drinks at the Apple, Greg settles into his chair with an unknown liquored drink. He leans forward staring at me from across the table and in his low guttural voice asked a question that completely blindsided me, "When are you going to make an honest woman out of my daughter?"
Considering Shannon is not caring child nor will she, unless we decide to make that life long commitment called marriage, this question came as quite a shock.
He continued, "You two have been dating almost seven months, don't you think it's about time you settle down?"
Now, seven month to me, is almost like a grace period. I get to know you, you get to know me. That is nowhere near my safe zone, of the "marriage talk." For me that's a minimum of two years.
"When we are both ready," was my reply.
"Because I have eight shotguns." He said taking a swig of his drink.


How on earth do you respond to that? Is he serious? Or is this his attempt at a joke? So, I responded with the only words that came to mind, "I have nine bulletproof vests."

This made him smile and the two ladies laugh nervously. The whole time, they are looking as red as the fruit in the bar's title.

He pressed again and this time I decided to answer truthfully.
"We both have goals we would like to accomplish before settling down. The final decision will be mine and Shannon's. Neither of us are ready just yet. When and if we are, we will go from there, but ultimately the decision should be hers and mine. There is no reason to rush into anything."
About that time, Cathee decided that was enough probing of their daughter's boyfriend. Luckily my name was called for karaoke a short time later, and I was able to escape from such an awkward scenario. Honestly, I didn't know how to respond, so I flew by the seat of my pants. Wrong or right, can't change it now.

The Itch of the Ear

My right ear itches. It's clean. I know because I clean it at the beginning of every month. So it can't be that. I scratch it again and it still itches.

(This is not my ear)
I cough because maybe it is my throat itching going up into my ear canal; it still doesn't help.
Am I going to die? Reason I ask because I've been doing this "Living" thing for the past 25 years and I kind of like it. I would like to keep doing it on account of liking it.

A Pricy Beverage

I have a query for my faithful readers: How much do you spend on a bottle of beer? On average I'm sure it's probably anywhere from $2 to $5 depending on what bar or grocery store you purchased said alcohol. I used to be a Budweiser or Miller Lite kind of guy, so my 6-pack price was relatively cheap. Recently I have been upgrading my taste in beer. As usual, this story must first be setup with a second story that I begin after starting the first story.

When my buddy Marcus moved to San Antonio around a month ago, he and I fell back into our old college ways of hitting up a bar a few times a week. Normally I have a beer at night right after a shower but before I cry myself to sleep in a fetal position. The benefit of having an old college drinking buddy back in town is we can relive the old days and drink like old times back in the old days, though our alcohol tolerance isn't what it used to be… not by a long shot. We were, like, the beer kings. Well, more I was the Beer Prince and Marcus was the Beer King. That boy could drink.

So we began to look for a good watering hole, settling on Flying Saucer. Because:

1: It is real close to my apartment. Worst case scenario I could walk home.

2: Their UFO Card.



Essentially their UFO card is a rewards program for drinking beer at their establishment. It is card that encourages you to drink, and the more you drink, the better the rewards. The goal is to try 200 different kinds of beer. When the 200 mark is reached you get your name printed on a Saucer. So Marcus and I decided it would be a fun goal to try for. Since I simplycouldn't drink 200 Budweiser, it forced me to expand my horizons.

Now when I go to the grocery store to buy beer, my 6-pack costs significantly more than before. There are so many other good beers I have discovered that put the generic stuff to shame. That began research into other facets of beer. Such as which beer is generally liked and which beer is generally spit out at the bartender who is then beaten for serving such a bitter brew?

After a little research, this led to the ultimate question:



What is the best beer in the world?





At first thought, I assumed this would be a relative question. After all, everybody loves something different and hates what his neighbor loves. So finding the world's best beer would be next to impossible to determine, right? I agree… or did.

Upon my quest to discover the world's best brew, I found that it wasn't that difficult to find what was widely accepted to be the best.

That title goes to Westvleteren 12.

(This is what the beer would look like if I took a picture)


Haven't heard of it? That's not surprising; it is brewed in a Belgium monastery. The monks do not export the beers. Literally the only way you can get a bottle is to travel there yourself and buy them from the monks. Or if you are lucky, find some one who did travel there and is willing to part with one. Now it may be the curiosity of the best beer ever or it may be that I simply cannot go up to HEB and pick one up… but I wanted to try it, bad.

As luck would smile down on me, I managed to find a single unopened bottle on sale on eBay. The guy recently returned from his trip to Belgium with his girlfriend and had one he wanted to part with.

I put in the bid, which was a bit high for my taste, and won!

The guy had a solid eBay rating, so it is legit… I think.

My bottle of Westvleteren 12 should arrive by Friday and I can give the ultimate beer, a taste. I just hope with the shipping costs, it will arrive in one piece. I can't tell you how excited I am to try what is called the "Best Beer in the World." This may be the and only time I get to try this. Hopefully it lives up to the expensive hype!

So how much did I spend on a single bottle of beer? I guarantee it's more than you have spent on a single bottle. Are you ready? For a single bottle of Westvleteren 12, dubbed the "Best Beer in the World" I paid $40.00.

And now you know.

Not So Safe

This is a blog I wrote for MySpace but I'm bringing it over to add to my blog postings. Gotta get those numbers up!

Let me ask you a question: Do you know how much a locksmith costs? I don't know off the top of my head either. However, I did come precariously close to finding that answer out for myself. This incident took place last weekend. No, not as in yesterday, I mean the weekend before that. For those of you who still might be confused, let me give out date of these happenings. May 10th, 2008 (Saturday) around 7pmish. Hey, it's a word, look it up.
The girlfriend, Shannon, and I were running a few errands, doing a little shopping. She's a girl, she likes to do those things. I play the role of good boyfriend; I follow her around, huff, sigh and roll my eyes.
To move on in this story we must first go back a few hours. That Friday night we found out Stone Temple Pilots is coming to the Alamo City. Shannon was so excited we got up early the very next day and purchased the tickets the moment they went on sale. To save a couple of bucks, we opted to pick them up at a local Ticketmaster outlet, instead of mailing them or printing them for a fee.
Being the airheaded couple we are, we left to run those errands without the confirmation number that allowed the person behind the counter to find and print our STP passes.
After running around finishing our errands, we ran back by my apartment. I had the bright idea of taking the apartment key off my key ring and giving it to the girlfriend, so we wouldn't have to kill the engine (which I hear uses up 7 minutes of gas everytime)
So Shannon runs inside, grabs the confirmation number and comes back out handing me the key, or so she says.
We run to HEB, get the tickets, grab liquor from the nearby liquor store that's close to and not too far away from HEB were we grabbed the tickets.
Shannon and I get back to my apartment and I go looking for they key she gave me, only to not find it. Anywhere. We emptied the bags, searched our pockets, under the chairs, in her pockets again, even in the glove compartment. Nothing.
Trying to remain calm, we trace our steps back to the HEB to the ticket counter all over the parking lot and even to the nearby liquor store that's close to and not too far away from HEB were we grabbed the tickets. Again, Nothing.
So I call my apartment complex's answering service requesting some one to come out and open the door. Surprise, there is a $25 dollar charge to do so. Despite one of the employees lives the next building over. The 5 minutes of her time it would take for her to walk over to the office, get the back-up key, unlock my apartment, return the key and go back to her place is worth the $25 fee.
I agree to pay the fee, but they can't get ahold of the manager, so we had to wait.
After a minute or two of sitting around, Shannon's light bulb went off above her head, which let me tell you is brighter than most people's. She knows stuff. Running around my building she said "I have an idea."
i followed as she jumped my back railing and went straight to my sliding door.
"It's locked" I said in dispair. When suddenly the door slide open. She told me, all you have to do is jiggle the door and it opens. My rush of relief was followed by terror. Holy Crap, anyone could have jiggled that door and taken everything in my place! Needless to say now I have a 10,000LB security bar. It sucks I lost my key, but it was good because who knows who might have broken in.
Thanks sweetie for losing my key, I know you say it was me who lost it, but I know the truth. You lost my key to show me how vunerable my apartment was to thieves. Thank you for taking the fall.
Word to the wise, if you don't have a security bar for your sliding door, get one!